Friday, May 01, 2015

Love and Illness

At The Arboretum

It seems curious minds are wondering how Mr. Kiernan and I are doing. 

Blooms At The Arboretum

Let's just say that we are very, very happy to be in the same place for an extended period of time now so that we can really spend quality time together getting to know each other more.

Not long after I returned from the beach, K left for 10 days to go to New Orleans Jazz Fest--his major vacation for the year--and we are just now able to relax into knowing we won't have any long periods apart for a while!

We are so so happy that Spring has sprung, and celebrated his first day back in town by going to the arboretum and out for sherbet. 

This was the first outing in which we took the wheelchair, loaded it into his car, and I really let him push me around more than just our block. 

I always tell Kiernan that he makes me feel so safe. He also makes me feel that my illness is not a 'bother'. He navigates it with such grace that I almost forget that he is making so many accommodations on my behalf. I have to step back for a moment and really take in all that he does--and remind myself how amazing this is.

(Thank you, baby, for all you do without making a fuss!)

The Tulips Are ALMOST Ready!

Dating with a chronic illness is new territory for me. As Kiernan and I navigate this path, I'll try to share what I feel is appropriate without violating what I feel should remain private between the two of us.

It requires a partner who can make physical and emotional adaptations. It requires a partner who can see your illness as part of you, but not the definition of you. It requires a partner who's own self-esteem is strong enough to be unaffected by a partner in a wheelchair or who needs help. It requires a partner who can go with the flow of good days and bad days. It requires a partner who recognizes that your house and set-ups are easier than navigating his house.

Can't Wait To Go Back And See Them In Full Bloom!

Two weekends ago, Kiernan and I had planned to go to one of the parks we really love. But the tree pollen hit hard and I felt awful. I was the one who had expectations of a great outing and felt terribly disappointed that we didn't get to go out. Kiernan came over, laid on my bed and said: "It's okay. There will be other days to go. Just lie down here and rest." So, we laid in bed watching the clouds float by, trying to decide what shapes they were.

Beautiful Oak Tree

Our day yesterday was so perfect. And going out and using The Rolls for the afternoon was a new big step for me. 

But Kiernan made it a non-issue. 

We topped the afternoon off with some sherbet. Yum!

While I napped, Kiernan napped a little too and read his book. We had dinner together. Kiernan heated things up and did all the clean up, which he ALWAYS does, while I sat and kept him company. He just knows this is part of the deal.

We watched Gone Girl. 

Mixing Lime and Orange :)

It was, in our eyes, the perfect day.



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